For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven:
a time to be born, and a time to die;
a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted;
a time to kill, and a time to heal;
a time to break down, and a time to build up;
a time to weep, and a time to laugh;
a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together;
a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
a time to seek, and a time to lose;
a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
a time to tear, and a time to sew;
a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
a time to love, and a time to hate;
a time for war, and a time for peace.
I have been thinking on and praying through these verses for you the past few days. I guess the change from summer to autumn has me thinking about seasons. I felt like I was in a blur last fall...my favorite season. I would try so hard to enjoy the colors of the changing leaves, but it was like I couldn't see them. Between stress, depression, PTSD, and lots of screaming/tantruming/raging from Happy...I couldn't relax. At night, as I tried to sleep, I would physically have to push my shoulders down...I was so tense...my shoulders were up close to my ears most of the time.
I don't know what season you're in with your adopted child. You may be breaking down. You may be building up. You may be weeping. You may be laughing. You may be mourning. You may be dancing. There is so much truth in each of these verses in regards to adoption. Read through them slowly, then go back and read them slowly again. If you're in a season of breaking down, weeping, mourning, etc., remember that another season will come. You WILL laugh again. You will dance. I think (hope) my family is in a healing season right now. Verse 11 says God has made everything beautiful in its time. Yes. He is still doing this in our families. It just takes time. Sometimes it takes a LONG time.
Joy WILL come, friends. If you're in the depths of the pit, I know you probably can't imagine feeling joy again. I was there not too long ago. Can I just share with you...the joy I have now is deep. Yes, I still get grumpy and impatient (often), but I am always aware of the presence of joy. Hebrews 12:2 says that Jesus endured the cross for the joy that was set before Him. I have such a new appreciation for this. The joy I feel now was WORTH the time I spent in the pit. I would endure our awful first year again knowing the joy that would come from it. And I appreciate the joy so much more than I did before my time in the pit. It's a rich joy, if that makes any sense.
Don't give up, friends. Joy WILL come. Your season of laughter and dancing and healing and loving...your season of peace will come. I am praying that it comes quickly for you.
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